Blog

This may be the recipe for a big fight, but AOL Health has some tips on how to tell your spouse to lose weight. We’ve ventured into this dangerous topic before when we listed ways to encourage a friend or loved one to lose weight. The first rule for dealing with such a sensitive topic is that you should be a cheerleader, not a coach.

A few of the tips we suggested were

• Offer to join them in eating healthy. Don’t compete to lose weight, instead offer to provide a partner in the process. Only they can motivate themselves to lose weight.
• Invite them to go on walks or some activity that you can do together.
• Offer to join them at the grocery store. Encourage them to make the right chooses about the food they are buying.

You could also offer to attend a free weight loss surgery seminar. Here’s some of AOL Health’s suggestions.

Easy does it
How do you bring the subject up to your partner?

Avoiding criticism of your partner is key. According to Tina Tessina, Ph.D., psychotherapist and author of “How to Be Free and Still Be a Couple,” the best way to raise the weight issue is to approach it from a health perspective. Gently bring up the topic by saying, “I want you to be around for a long time and I’m worried about your health.”

Don’t say the F word
That three-letter word (Fat) is sure to hurt feelings. Similarly, the words ‘you’ve gained weight’ should never cross your lips, says Cynthia Sass, M.P.H., M.A., R.D., co-author of “Your Diet is Driving Me Crazy: When Food Conflicts Get in the Way of Your Love Life.” Your partner already knows that he or she has gained weight — (he/she has a scale and a mirror, right?). There’s no need to emphasize the point. Instead, focus on why your partner has gained weight and try to help them with the root problem. What your spouse needs most is support and encouragement for tackling the problem. Create an action plan, which includes specific strategies for lending support.

Sweat together
Getting active and staying fit is a partnership.

“Take walks, ride bikes, go swimming, learn to kayak … or have more sex,” says Tessina. But never launch into a competitive challenge, which experts claim is the kiss of death — both for your workout and your relationship. Instead, find creative ways to motivate and support each other. Launch a win-win challenge by putting $5 in a pot for every pound lost or every 10 miles you run — no matter which partner does the losing or running. Then, use the money to buy something for both of you. Couples massage anyone?

Don’t cop out
And don’t hoard harmful snacks!

“Food policing is one of the most serious food-related issues between partners,” says Sass. “And in most cases, it fuels the behavior the food cop is trying to change.” A better approach: Stock the fridge with ready-to-eat produce. Keep cherry tomatoes, sliced cucumbers, baby carrots and celery sticks on hand. Cut watermelon, honeydew and cantaloupe into cubes and make it available for an impromptu craving.

Visit NicholsonClinic.com for more information about weight loss surgery
AOL Health article